Sawant's Scrapbook

Blonde Joke

Three blondes were all applying for the last available position on the Texas Highway Patrol. The detective conducting the interview looked at the three of them and said, “So y’all want to be cops, huh?”The blondes all nodded.
The detective got up, opened a file drawer, and pulled out a folder.
Sitting back down, he opened it, pulled out a picture, and said, “To be a detective, you have to be able to detect. You must be able to notice things such as distinguishing features and oddities like scars and so forth.”
So he stuck the photo in the face of the first blonde and withdrew it after about two seconds. “Now,” he said, “did you notice any distinguishing features about this man?”

The blonde immediately said, “Yes, I did. He has only one eye!”
The detective shook his head and said, “Of course he has only one eye in this picture! It’s a side profile of his face! You’re dismissed!”
The first blonde hung her head and walked out of the office.
The detective then turned to the second blonde, stuck the photo in her face for two seconds, pulled it back, and said,”What about you? Notice anything unusual or Outstanding about this man?”
"Yes! He only has one ear!"

The detective put his head in his hands and exclaimed, “Didn’t you hear what I just told the other lady? This is side picture profile of the man’s face! Of course you can only see one ear! You’re excused too!”
The second blonde sheepishly walked out of the office.
The detective turned his attention to the third and last blonde and said, “This is probably a waste of time, but….” He flashed the photo in her face for a couple of seconds and withdrew it, saying, “All right, did you notice anything distinguishing or unusual features about this man?”
The blonde said, “I sure did. This man wears contact lenses.”
The detective frowned, took another look at the picture, and began looking at some of the papers in the folder. He looked up at the blonde with a puzzled expression and said, “You’re absolutely right! His bio says he wears contacts! How in the world could you tell that by looking at his picture?”
The blonde rolled her eyes and said, “Well, Hellooooooooooooo! With only one eye and one ear, he certainly can’t wear glasses.”

It does not require many words o speak the truth.

– Chief Joseph

A ceramics teacher announced on opening day that he was dividing the class into two groups. All those on the left side of the studio, he said, would be graded solely on the quantity of work they produced, all those on the right solely on its quality.

His procedure was simple: on the final day of class he would bring in his bathroom scales and weigh the work of the “quantity” group: fifty pound of pots rated an “A”, forty pounds a “B”, and so on. Those being graded on “quality”, however, needed to produce only one pot — albeit a perfect one — to get an “A”.

Well, came grading time and a curious fact emerged: the works of highest quality were all produced by the group being graded for quantity.

It seems that while the “quantity” group was busily churning out piles of work — and learning from their mistakes — the “quality” group had sat theorizing about perfection, and in the end had little more to show for their efforts than grandiose theories and a pile of dead clay.

– (via jacob)

Interesting.

(Source: superamit)

Via Jacob Bijani

They deem me mad because I will not sell my days for gold; and I deem them mad because they think my days have a price.

– Kahlil Gibran (via @Shaistajafri)

Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.

– Issac Asimov (via apophatically) Via Nothing to See Here

The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom

– Isaac Asimov  (via jackdoylenotdaniels) Via Things that go through my head

Bloody brilliant shot!!

(Photography by: David Chambon.)



Breathtaking!

(Source: stuckincustoms.com)



Amazing!



Awesome!


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